10/5/2010
Christopher-
     Today was your first day of preschool at the Nano Nagle Child Care Center at St. Vincent's.  Dad dropped you off this morning and then dad and Alex and I all picked you up.  I knew I would cry if I was the one that dropped you off so we thought it would be better if dad did it.  I think you had a little bit of a melt down after dad left and you were crying when we got there.  When I saw you crying it made me cry a little.  In fact, just thinking about it is making me cry right now.  I'm sure you'll get comfortable eventually.  But since you are only going to be going 2 days a week I just worry that it's going to take a long time.  Dad and I went to an engaged encounter convention this past weekend and one of the things that one of the speakers said is that life is not about the destination it's about the journey.  That's something that keeps going through my head.  I keep trying to think about and influence how you'll be and who you'll be in the future instead of appreciating you and loving you for who you are now.  You're not going to be 2 years old forever so I need to take advantage of the time and experiences that I have with you now.  I don't know exactly what that means, but I guess for now I just need to stop worrying about whether or not you'll cry when you go to school on Thursday.  I'm going to be here for you if you need me and focus on the positive things so that you'll look forward to going to school.
     So, I'm totally over analyzing.  I love you so much and just want to do everything I can so that you'll be happy!